outside

seasonal heart

seasonal heart

these days of muted light feel just about right. sometimes my heart feels wide open, easily accessible, like the bright blue. but not lately. no, when the sun gets further away, a thin sheet of ice weathered from the events and circumstances of the year […]

raspberry beret

raspberry beret

a funny thing kept happening as we walked alone in rows of raspberries.  every spot we stopped to pick there would be a better one directly across the way. each time the very next row would hold larger berries, branches with fruit threatening to drop […]

whether or not you have ever dared to pray

whether or not you have ever dared to pray

maybe the light at the end of the tunnel is really a lamp lit in the window. seems the largest part of my life is a grasping, a strangling, trying to make a good thing and hold on to it as tight as i can. […]

writing lonely stories

writing is ministering, pastoring, chaplaincy. i come to you and trace my scars with a fingertip.  i show you the map of me and at the same time you see that i’m healed up now, that i’m still here, that i’m okay. and so are […]

a fairytale they say

the snow started coming down and eleanor wanted to build a snowman with her dad.  she waited patiently.  she let her wishes be known.  she left the request on her father’s ear. we were busy.  abe had a dance on friday night.  saturday was special […]

ascending at your friend’s house

before jesus ascended into heaven, he took a walk. he led his followers to bethany on the eastern slope of the mount of olives, a sabbath day’s journey, about a half mile. he blessed them, lifted his hands and bye. mary, martha and the resurrected […]

the stories we tell

i ended up outside. sometimes early january is friendly to outside morning dwellers.  this happens very rarely in michigan.  i still almost don’t believe it. the water was still and the city was so quiet.  i had to take a picture. i haven’t done this […]

october reminds me of summer

the summer was good. yes, i’m still thinking about summer.  i still am processing that it’s over. we looked out the windows this morning and frost was holding fast to the top of the car, to the clover on the yard.  the heat has been […]

jordan almonds and jesus christ

i’ve been thinking about jordan almonds lately. and how the weakest among us take the brunt of our anger. and how jesus is both. he’s the jordan almonds and the weakest among us. it was my dad’s cousin’s wedding where i first tasted jordan almonds. […]

failing at jesus stuff

she told me their church had split and that people were saying terrible things about them. i nodded my head and listened. silent, i nodded. churches are trouble, i thought.  churches are the problem.  they’re so messy, i thought. and when i looked out on […]