apparently twenty years isn’t very long. when i was young a month seemed never ending and a year felt so vast that it couldn’t be conceived. but tomorrow joshua and i will have been married for twenty years.  somehow it doesn’t feel like very much […]

a fairytale they say

the snow started coming down and eleanor wanted to build a snowman with her dad.  she waited patiently.  she let her wishes be known.  she left the request on her father’s ear. we were busy.  abe had a dance on friday night.  saturday was special […]

so young at the start

i met a young man.  he was too popular and too talented and i watched from a distance, quiet.  i was so broken, i gambled a kiss with him and lost on purpose. our relationship has always been a gamble. our first date was a […]

wanted: one husband

i’ve spent the summer with my family. my husband has blurred.  he’s one of the five of us.  we’re all in this together. but i don’t know. sometimes i miss the two of us. apparently he could have been found on the beach in his […]


i’ve watched and waited for the anxious in him.  he’s not one to worry.  hurry doesn’t sound like a good idea.  he thinks about what to do and lets time shake a few things out before moving forward. he loves.   when we talked of […]

sincere and pretend

and then it was december 25th. as soon as we find out we are pregnant, we put the tv out on the curb.  wanting to have integrity about raising a child without one, we thought we should get rid of it before they even arrive. […]

for unto us a son is given

we had traveled for christmas. every holiday, a road trip, in the early days of our marriage. this time we landed with his family. the in-laws. the not mine. the other way of doing christmas, of doing family. in keeping with a rocky courtship, we’d […]

the practice of staying in irons

the practice of staying in irons

seventy percent of the earth’s surface is covered by water. the human body is about seventy percent water, too. god may be trying to tell us something. each human being is a walking ocean. we, every one of us, has depths therein that can’t be […]

a little more than i knew

i find old letters.  we were engaged.  he was in chicago and i was in detroit. i read the words i wrote and i shake my head at love bold written down.  i wanted to be married to joshua. but i didn’t know what i […]

public transportation

joshua rides the bus into the city.  he walks to woodward and catches the huffing, barreling road vehicle designed to carry passengers. he pays his fare and he gets on board.  he sits with the people who don’t have cars and who are headed into […]