seasonal heart

these days of muted light feel just about right.

sometimes my heart feels wide open, easily accessible, like the bright blue.

but not lately.

no, when the sun gets further away, a thin sheet of ice weathered from the events and circumstances of the year forms.

the thin places turn into visible pools of murky, deep that don’t exactly scream welcome.

sigh.  tis the season.

its good not to forget everything that makes you who you are.  its good not to only look at your most recent days and decide that’s who you are.

i’m not just this winter heart.

sometimes it seems the invisible world of one human soul is enough to fill the entirety of the visible world.

the wounds, the coping, the lies, the fears – one soul projected in visible, solid display would be enough to make me head for shelter.

but i forget that the pain of the past and the present isn’t the only real, invisible thing.

i’m waiting for the ice to melt.

i know it will.

it always does.

but for now just a small reminder to myself not to get trapped beneath the ice.

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