he loved me

dead
i like to remember that i was without hope and without god.

i was foreign to the promises of good towards me.  i was separate and excluded from all of it.  no luck around every corner then.

until – and then he loved me.

close

he came and spoke peace, calm in the storm.

peace.

i was far off, delirious with anger, an object of wrath most days.  he came close and said it slowly.  i was as treacherous as a snake.

peace.

and when a dead thing hears a kind word, it cannot, does not understand what is being said.  true kindness though, the beating heart kindness of a loving god, well…it is steady and constant.

it beats out it’s indecipherable code to dead ears.

i needed a code breaker.

living

i was more than lost.

i was deceased.

little more and a little less than a puppet strung up by whichever spirit wanted its way with me.

a zombie, a dead man propped up, weekend at bernie’s.

and then a brilliant mind broke the code and told me the good news close like a whisper to my ear.  like a lover with a promise.  like real breath on a real face.

he did it to make me alive.

with christ

so i am no longer a stranger in the house of unexpected goodness.

i hope this year that god will strengthen you.  i hope that his close words would fill you in your inner being so that christ may dwell in your heart through faith.

i’ve broken the code, so hear the good news.

you are loved.

This entry was posted in death, faith, love, real life. Bookmark the permalink.

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2 Responses to he loved me

  1. Ruth says:

    You have such a beautiful way with words that touch the soul. I can relate to your words…I needed a code breaker,so true!
    Happy New Year Zena, and to all your loves!

  2. zena says:

    happy new year to you ruth.

    may your 2015 be blessed my friend.

    ~ zena

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