the problem with surrounding yourself with truth tellers is they tell you the truth.
i’ve been giving paper a sideways glance and walking into the kitchen to do the dishes. i would start to type a blog post and then delete the words not liking the tone, my tone, any voice that comes from my heart.
i didn’t know where to start or how to stop or if i should begin again, if beginning is the right word.
i don’t know the right words.
but i don’t talk about it.
it’s a weakness, a fault line cracked through the land of me way back when. i tend not to tell you what’s going on inside. unless it’s with a pencil.
so i just kept doing.
doing stuff. doing anything.
mopping floors. buying murphy’s oil soap. considered washing the windows even. okay, i did wash one and a half windows. folded laundry. made beds. vacuumed. looked into nursing programs and pharmacy programs and re-imagined life back in school.
the lengths we’ll go to to avoid the real things we’re meant to do.
then i did a dangerous thing.
i talked to my friends.
my jesus women who hear me out completely and are gentle in their hearing and telling. they sit on their three-legged-stools and speak the truth in love.
these are the women you want to avoid.
if you would prefer to keep avoiding things and cleaning stuff and taking classes – do not talk to the truth tellers.
but i did just that.
and surprise, surprise – they told the truth.
i was surprised though. the truth does that.
it always surprises.
it’s character is that way. it brings the clean, cool air to your soul and when you know it, you know it. and even when you don’t want to hear it, you are so glad to hear it.
so to all the truth tellers in the room.
please be quiet.
no, please don’t.
keep telling us the truth.
if you don’t, who will?
gratitude journal ~ one thousand gifts ~ 2276 – 2292
moon over lake huron
purple sky at dusk
kids seeing it all
vines and branches